Calling: Do & Don't

Do:

	Pray before you make the call.
	Be a good listener.
	Tell them how sorry you are for their loss.
	Ask if there is anything you can do.
	Ask if you can come by and bring some food for the family (if you are local).

Don't:

bullet
DO NOT Tell them stories about other people who have died.

bullet
DO NOT Ask them to return the call if you get the answering machine.

bullet
DO NOT Ramble on about your own problems or what's going on in your life.

bullet
DO NOT Tell them you understand.

bullet
DO NOT Tell them "all things work together for good". (Although true, they don't want to hear that right now because it brings little comfort in the beginning)

bullet
DO NOT Say anything in the realm of, "It's for the best" or "You can have more kids" or "Things can always be worse" or "Look on the bright side..." or "You need something to take your mind off of things."

bullet
DO NOT Say anything that starts with "If you don't mind my asking..."

bullet
DO NOT Ask them to give you a call if they need anything. (Put yourself in their place and try to anticipate what they might need.)

Back (use if coming from "What can I do or say?")